Overview
I work with many leaders and adults who experience the traits of ADHD and receive many requests for resources. Sadly, these requests are often not from the person themselves, but from a manager, partner or friend.
Those with ADHD traits generally try to go it alone. They often got the message as children, over and over, that they should just “get it together”, “stop being lazy” and, forlornly, that they had “so much potential.” They were seen as smart, and many were even told (in not so many words) that being smart was what made them valued and loveable. This created a terrible bind: to ask for help, or to admit they didn’t know, would mean that they weren’t smart – and therefore not valued or loveable.
For this reason it’s often best to start by offering written resources. Here are a few I have found useful for clients in beginning the journey from frustration and shame to revelation and empowerment.
I am also available for a free consultation.
Books
Adult ADHD: How To Succeed As A Hunter in a Farmer’s World
Thom Hartmann introduced one of the most powerful positive frames for the ADHD experience that I’ve heard so far. His invitation to a hunter/farmer way of seeing oneself, a positive way of thinking about oneself instead of a dour clinical diagnosis, was game changing. This book is a little dated, but deserves a place here for this reason alone.
The ADHD Effect on Marriage
This offers some perspective to the partner of someone with ADHD, which can be extremely helpful. For the person with ADHD traits it does a nice job of describing the experience in a way that can help in being seen and understood. Clients also regularly have ah-ha moments as they recognize additional patterns they hadn’t yet caught and this opens the opportunity to respond differently.
You Mean I’m Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder
It is, in fact, a classic. While I find it a little heavy on the medication side, the authors describe the ADHD experience and talk about the shame cycle and defense against reality that are common hindrances. They also survey many alternative treatments and practices, as well as ways to adjust and respond to life more skillfully.
The Edison Gene
Thom Hartmann’s more recent book is aimed at rethinking how we work with children of ADHD but features more research and practical advice. It can be a bit scattered (surprise) as he wanders around into evolutionary history but is also a fascinating read.
Articles
Mindfulness Meditation Training for Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder in Adulthood: Current Empirical Support, Treatment Overview, and Future Directions
Mindfulness meditation has been one of the most transformative practices available. That said, starting out by just sitting down on your own can be extremely challenging. I recommend beginning with a movement-based mindfulness practice initially, such as Qigong, Taiji or Yoga that incorporate the original mindful aspects of these practices and work towards a standing and then seated practice.
You can also jump-start a practice by diving directly into a multi-day silent meditation retreat. This often provides enough of a big, tangible experience that it’s clear what to work towards and why. And, of course, people with ADHD traits often love things that are “full on.” 😉
A Natural Fix for A.D.H.D. – New York Times
While technically an opinion piece, it references a lot of key learnings (like the lack of dopamine receptors) and even references the Hunter/Farmer frame.
Could How You Sleep Be Linked to ADHD? – Wall Street Journal
People with ADHD traits have both a slow morning release of dopamine and cortisol and a slow evening release and response to melatonin. The described use of artificial sunlight lead me to the original research and experimenting with a SAD lamp in the morning to create a consistent wakeup time. The results have been significant for clients I’ve recommended it to so far – more alertness in the morning and better mood throughout the day. The Happy Light is one model, and the same company now makes a less expensive smaller light. (Affiliate links) Warning: as stated, while positive for people with ADHD this use of a SAD light for people with bipolar symptoms can be detrimental.
Of course, real sunlight (when available) is also a great source of vitamin D – which is often chronically low (at least in the US) and a lack of which is linked to depression.
Study: Subcortical brain volume differences in participants with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder in children and adults: a cross-sectional mega-analysis – The Lancet
Brains are different! Sometimes it’s nice to know that clinical studies, or use of an MRI, reveal real differences in the brain. This can help us believe that we aren’t “making it up” after years of doubt by ourselves and others around us.
Additude Magazine
This requires a mention because they are the most well known online source for ADHD conversation and information. It also does a lot of selling itself in every article, which can be a little frustrating and – it’s a carnival of distractions throughout. (Actually, this is sadly true of any online resource I link to here, so ADHD reader beware.)
